Tips for Dads During Divorce

 Posted on August 23, 2022 in Illinois Divorce

Dealing with a divorce is difficult for an entire family. However, unique issues can arise for non-custodial fathers after a separation or divorce. No longer living with your children is difficult, and it can be devastating for a parent. Suppose you are a father who is no longer the primary custodial guardian in your child's life. In that case, it is a good idea to prepare for this transition in a few ways. Here are four critical tips for dads during a divorce.

Stay on Top of Your Parenting Plan

When you are no longer the custodial guardian of your children, it is easy to overlook the day-to-day activities and responsibilities of being a parent. It is important to stay organized with your parental responsibilities. During the divorce, both parents are included in creating custody, visitation time, and responsibility plans for life after the separation. Typically, each parent is allocated specific responsibilities and visitation with the children. You must stay on top of these responsibilities to maintain an important role in their lives.

Spend Time Helping Your Kids Cope

Divorces and separations can be highly confusing for young children. No matter your child's age, they may be grieving the old familial structure, especially if you are no longer living with them. During visitation time, or when you have your shared custody arrangement, take the time to speak with your children and support their emotions.

Kids whose parents are no longer married are at a higher risk for emotional distress and resulting issues. Here are the best ways to soothe a distressed child dealing with divorce, according to the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychology:

• Reassure your children that they are loved and supported no matter what
• Be open to your children that this is a sad and unfamiliar time for the parents as well
• Try not to speak poorly about your ex-spouse to the children
• Explain to them that the divorce was not their fault
• Keep the conversation simple and direct to avoid confusion for small children

Stay Connected

When you are not physically with your child, there are great ways to stay connected to them at a distance. Facetime, Skype, and other video platforms are a way to speak one-on-one with your children. Non-custodial fathers can also send care packages, letters, and gifts through the mail. Sending a message, whether digitally or physically, that you are thinking of your children can help reassure them and strengthen your relationship from afar.

Make the Most of Your Time

During your joint-custody or visitation time, another way to stay connected with your children is by making memories. While children need to stick to a routine, it can also help strengthen a bond between parent and child to do fun and engaging activities. Some example activities include:

• Doing an arts and crafts project
• Having a movie night
• Playing outside
• Going on a day trip or a mini-vacation
• Going to a trampoline park or playground

Ask a Kane County Family Lawyer

Suppose you have questions or concerns regarding your upcoming divorce or current custody arrangements. In that case, our team of St. Charles family lawyer attorneys is here to help you. At Weiler & Associates, Inc., our attorneys can help guide you towards a parenting plan that meets you and your family's needs. Feel free to contact us today by calling 630-331-9110.

Sources:

https://www.ilga.gov/legislation/ilcs/ilcs4.asp?ActID=2086&ChapterID=59&SeqStart=8300000&SeqEnd=10000000

https://www.ilga.gov/legislation/ilcs/documents/075000050k505.htm

https://www.aacap.org/AACAP/Families_and_Youth/Facts_for_Families/FFF-Guide/Children-and-Divorce-001.aspx